I am so honored to share with you a very special project Cambelle and I were hand selected to take part in by Mic in collaboration with Dove. I wasn’t able to talk about it until the final product was published, but here we are…everything is live and now I get to sing from the rooftops how proud I am of the magic we created.
We filmed for nearly 9 hours, and they beautifully cut it down to 2 minutes, so you can imagine how much didn’t make it into the final video! I figured that is where a blog post would come in handy! So I am sharing some of the behind the scenes of the whole day with you here!
First of all, what is the Mother Daughter Loop?
Essentially, it is the fact that a Mother’s body image and self esteem directly affects and DETERMINES the daughter’s body image and self esteem. In other words, the way I feel about my body will become how my daughter feels about her body. We had the chance to talk all about how my ability to find confidence in my skin will afford Cambelle the opportunity to not have to question hers.
In a conversation with the producer, I suggested it goes even further than that. Instead of envisioning this relationship only going from mother to daughter, I believe that this loop can also go right back around from daughter to mother as I have found my own self love journey has empowered both my mother and mother in law to come to terms with some very limiting beliefs they have carried for decades and finally feel free.
It just takes one. One woman unapologetically loving herself to start an entire legacy of self love.
Want to hear more about what we got to do?
Well we started the day with a fun photoshoot on the beach. Graham in tow as our trusty photographer, and new suits provided by Albion Fit, Cambelle and I took to the sands to show them all we had! We sweated our booties off, as well as all my makeup…and in case anyone was wondering – no Cambelle did NOT get her cast wet haha!
After that we headed inside and freshened up. Cambelle had an opportunity to put on one heck of a rockstar show with her karaoke machine where she sang an original that went something like this “I love myself and I love JESUS” at the top of her lungs. We made a fun and healthy lunch of strawberries, kiwis, goldfish, chicken and other things I can’t remember and had a chat about what the first day of school would be like.
After our lunch break we reconvened for an all out dance party, mostly to Jo-Jo Siwa songs as she vetod my choice of Despacito. By this point, Cambelle thought the whole day was about her and she was reaching diva status.
Finally we finished out the day with one on one interviews. I am going to recap a few of my favorite questions:
How do you teach your daughter to have a healthy relationship with food?
First and foremost, I teach her to eat. I know that may sound silly, but the rhetoric around food is to limit the intake, to remove whole food groups and to diet which means to essentially not eat. We have such a distorted view of how food is supposed to work with us, that we are afraid of food. That said, I want her to know that it is always necessary to eat, and to listen to her body when she is hungry. I know that some may say, but how will she know when to stop. WE KNOW. Our bodies know when to stop. When we stop intervening with outside "knowledge" then our minds and bodies can work together on the perfect nutrition for. Further, we do not talk about "good" foods or "bad" foods, and instead we focus on what the foods we eat may be used for in our bodies to make the best educated choice on what to eat.
What does the Mother-Daughter Loop mean to you?
When I first became a mother to my daughter, being a role model felt like such a burden. Something I was constantly afraid of messing up, something that felt nearly impossible. As I have grown tremendously in the pursuit of my own self love since giving birth to her, I now view my impression on her as an immense honor and opportunity to change the path for our next generation for the better. It has become my life’s work to PREVENT our future generations from ever having to heal and recover from the lack of self esteem and body hatred that myself and all my peers have been healing from.
What inspired your children’s book series “Glitter Stripes”?
After Cambelle and I’s conversation about stretch marks went viral, I knew that I wanted to provide a tool for parents, mentors, and teachers to have inside their homes and classrooms that provides a new dialogue about bodies and opens up the conversation in a gentle and positive way. Each book in the Glitter Stripes series will tackle a body confidence or bullying issue and give a positive solution for kids to learn how to handle these situations with themselves and with friends. I am also so thrilled to create a series that has visibly larger characters, we do not see any stories with plus size characters having a main and positive role in literature or tv/film.
What would happen if women knew their worth?
Oh such amazing things would happen. If our girls grew up NEVER questioning whether or not they were good enough, worthy enough, loved enough, enough enough…they would be literally unstoppable, and they would change the world.
Cambelle had her time to shine in front of the camera, after some coaxing with the promise of starbursts. The best snipits of her interview made it into the Dove video, especially when she said “I love being a good sister and a leader to my friends and my brother”, also “Everybody has fat, it’s okay to have fat”
It was such an incredible honor to have the Mic team visit with us and learn all about the inner workings of our life and how I raise a body confident family. It is my hope that the magic that came from this project blesses the hundreds of thousands of people that have a chance to see it and allows them to see how important their role is as the guiding compass for their family. I hope they see it as an honor and not a burden. And I hope they know that it is never too late to welcome self love into their own lives in order to positively impact those around them.
And just like that, after 9 hours of filming, we bid adieu to our new friends, Bethany and Liz from Mic and mama got a glass of wine!
And as always, Just do you babes!
Allie and Cambelle